Some families break apart quietly. No violence. No shouting. No affair. Just something that doesn’t make sense anymore – and no one can quite explain why.

One of our NLP4Kids practitioners found herself in exactly that situation. And what she uncovered went far beyond anything she’d been trained for. It wasn’t a difficult parent or poor communication. It was something darker, more invisible… and it could happen to anyone.

When Behaviour Change Isn’t Just Behaviour

She had been called in to work with two children. Their mother explained that they were now living in part of the house with her – while Dad was technically still living there, but apart. Not separated. Not divorced. Just… apart.

The family dynamics had shifted dramatically, and the children were unsettled. The brief was clear: help them cope with the change. That’s it.

But the moment the practitioner described Dad’s behaviour to me, something in my gut twisted. Aggressive tone. Intrusive presence. Inappropriate comments. Repetitive actions. An atmosphere so unsettling it made Mum feel unsafe in her own home.

“This doesn’t sound like a family issue. It sounds like a neurological one.”

That sentence came out of my mouth before I even had time to think it through. Because the symptoms were hauntingly familiar.

When Personal Experience Becomes Professional Instinct

Some of you will know – about a decade ago, my own mum was diagnosed with a rare form of dementia: frontotemporal dementia. Unlike Alzheimer’s, it doesn’t start with forgetfulness. It starts with a personality change. A person you love becomes someone you no longer recognise. It is devastating. It’s disorienting. It’s dangerously easy to misinterpret.

My NLP4Kids practitioner hadn’t been told any of this. She was just there to support the children. But I had a strong suspicion – this wasn’t a behaviour issue. This was frontal lobe damage. I encouraged her to gently advise the family to seek a neurological evaluation for Dad.

And I wasn’t wrong.

It turned out that Dad had been in an accident. A head injury. One the family had known about – but they hadn’t connected the dots. Only when they looked back with this new insight did they realise: the man they’d been tiptoeing around wasn’t emotionally broken. He was neurologically impaired.

It was a diagnosis of traumatic brain injury. The shift in him wasn’t chosen. It was inflicted.

“Sometimes, being an NLP4Kids practitioner means drawing from the textbooks. And sometimes… it means drawing from your life.”

Why Coaching Franchises Must Be Prepared for the Unknown

This isn’t the first time I’ve spotted this kind of situation. It’s happened in People Building, too – only that time, I was face to face with the client. I’m not a neuroscientist, but I know the signs. Because I’ve lived them.

The important thing here isn’t just the diagnosis. It’s what happens next.

And it’s something I’m relentless about teaching in my practitioner trainings: Knowing “why” isn’t the fix. It just explains what broke. But if we can understand what we’re working with, we can choose better strategies for moving forward.

That’s the power of what we do. And why I’m proud that NLP4Kids is more than just a children’s mental health brand. It’s a coaching franchise with real-world depth. We equip practitioners to think critically, listen deeply, and spot the things others miss – even when no one’s told them to look.

And let’s be honest – these days, families are navigating a lot of hidden traumas. Trauma that doesn’t always look like trauma. Behaviour that masks neurological damage. Parenting that’s actually survival mode. If our coaching franchise licensees aren’t trained to handle the unexpected, then we’re just peddling generic support. And that’s not what the world needs.

Every Family Deserves a Practitioner Who Knows What to Look For

Whether you’re already part of the NLP4Kids family or still considering joining us, know this: our training doesn’t just teach you what to do – it teaches you how to see. And in a world this complex, that might just be what saves someone.

Not every coaching franchise prepares you for that level of responsibility. Ours does. And that’s why LPVPs – our Licencee Practitioner Verified Professionals – remain our number one priority.

by Gemma Bailey (with the help of Ai)

Becoming a Licensee